Tag: Loss

Sitting in a bed we had once shared together. That was our sons first “big boy” bed. The one that has a rock n rye stain in the right corner. Now sitting in your brothers old room. I was consumed with the thought that I would need to go downstairs. That is where I left … Continue reading Day 361

You know those times where you realize what a strong woman you are but suddenly panic because you don’t know how you’ve done it. I can feel it like a surge in the ocean building power. What’s coming? Am I strong enough? Awakening colliding with killing I can feel the crash It’s like being drunk … Continue reading Day 359

Slowly opening my eyes I pause to take a breath. You know where you are. Driving into the Detroit the tears just fell. Turning onto Gratiot I felt like there was no way I could do this. A swirl of coming home and complete fear. When did this become home? How? Fucking Detroit. You loved … Continue reading Day 360

My first husband was never really my husband. In the world of drugs every dude needs an old lady. Their ride or die. For years I was his. Even when I wasn’t I was. Our souls entwined. Yesterday I was able to have closure around my first loss. Many times I have pointed the finger … Continue reading Day 358

You are the end to my beginning. Everything and nothing all at once. You’re memories rip through this tiny little island I have become. Leaving me desolate and unable to see through my now ill adjusted eyes. How can one soul have such force. If not him then why? Why would the human mind allow … Continue reading Day 353

“I remember thinking Are we out of the woods yet? Are we out of the woods yet? Are we out of the woods yet? Are we in the clear yet?” -T.S. ” I can’t wait to be your wife” We had met in October and I knew instantly you were my one. As I whispered … Continue reading Day 349

“There's a war inside of me Do I cause new heartbreak to write a new broken song Do I push it down or let it run me Right into the ground But I feel like I wouldn't like me If I met me I feel like I wouldn't like me If I met me” -You … Continue reading Day 348

I catch myself pretending you're at softball often. I am completely unsure that means progression or regression. This awaken is so painful. How many more times will I return to this same dark and empty island? I have jumped in to the murky waters it feels like a million times. Floundering about in a panic … Continue reading Day 345

" I'll smile. I know what it takes to fool this town. I'll do it till the sun goes down and all through the night time. I'll tell you what you wanna hear but leave my sunglasses on while I shed a tear. It's never the right time. I'll put my armor on so you … Continue reading Day 343