Day 513

“If only you knew- the sunlight shines a little brighter, the weight of the world’s a little lighter, the stars lean in a little closer all because of you.

I want to see you lift your chin a little higher, open your eyes a little wider, speak your mind a little louder, ’cause you are royalty.

This is your kingdom, this is your crown, this is your story. this is your moment, don’t look down..

You’re ready, born ready. and all you gotta do is put one foot in front of you. our ceiling is your floor, and all you gotta do is put one foot in front of you, if only you knew”

-Sleeping at Last

Little moon,

Two years ago you arrived.

Completing our family.

I will never forget the pure joy on your Daddy’s face when he found out you were going to be.

He walked in from meeting with a sponsee after long and challenging day.

I had set up a message on our kitchen wall that he completely had not seen while making his nightly snack.

Coming to bed I stared at him.

He looked at me bewildered.

I didn’t want to say.

You were someone we had wanted.

Badly.

He laughed and said how weird I was.

I am.

You know.

Then he went about his nightly routine.

Suddenly from the other room “Babe? BABE!?”

“Yeah?”

“Really!” He said walking into our room.

Huge smile on his face.

Looking at me glancing down at my tummy that held you.

He stood there with tears in his eyes before throwing himself on the bed to whisper “I love you baby” directly to you.

We both sat smiling and laughing for a few minutes.

Like something out of a movie.

He fell asleep with his hand on my stomach that night.

I remember thinking maybe he was scared but he was always the anchor I needed when lost.

As time went on and you grew I saw more and more how happy he truly was of your existence.

When we found out you were a girl however it was complete fear.

You.

You were the perfect ending to our family.

He looked at me and said “ I’m fucked” 😂

“Look how beautiful you are. Our daughter is going to make me buy guns and want to hurt boys”

He loved you.

I loved you.

Brother loved you.

Long before we knew you.

Daddy found “The perfect house for two kids”

I remember taking time off work finally.

Setting up your room together.

He was there always saying good night to you.

Always saying “Love you babe. Have a good day.” And yelling “I love you baby Izzy” as he walked out the door for his incredibly long days.

You.

You were our catalyst.

The last piece to our puzzle.

Our Moon.

Happy birthday baby girl.

You are so so loved.

May you never doubt that.

My little light in the dark 💕