Day 378

So much death.
Both physically and metaphorically. I’m so fucking sick of death. I did not agree an eternity to death. I made a promise to my husband. To remain unwavering in the storm.

I’m angry. God I am fucking angry again!

Ready? Steady? Go!

I have been searching endlessly for something that has no name. Does it even exist? As I take another step on my path I can see my past darkening. Things that once brought such comfort and completeness are like staring at a snowing tv with white noise all around. I feel no pain. Perhaps grief really has won in this war? How can I feel nothing? Peace? Peace is a made up fucking fairytale. How can someone like me find peace?

I need to sit and write.
For days.
A spiritual cleansing.
Help find and be found
Help find and be found
Share. Speak. Don’t hold back. That time has passed. This is now. This is the turning point. Make good fucking decisions for once and you’ll be just fine.

Find North.

Late night ramblings in a widows brain ☝️🤦‍♀️

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